Priti's story: "It can be exhausting being a mum with rheumatoid arthritis"

Living with rheumatoid arthritis

Priti discovered she had rheumatoid arthritis when she was pregnant with her second baby. Having tried several different medications, she found etanercept made a real difference in managing her symptoms. In Arthritis UK, she's found her community and learned more about how to manage her condition.

"It wasn’t until I was pregnant with my second baby that I knew something wasn’t right. I was in a lot of pain, so they sent me for more tests. Then I found out I had rheumatoid arthritis.

While I was pregnant, I had a swollen knee and was achy. I was exhausted but my doctors just put it down to the pregnancy. It wasn’t until I was pregnant with my second baby in 2018 that I knew something wasn’t right. I was in a lot of pain, so they sent me for more tests. Then I found out I had rheumatoid arthritis.

Since then, I’ve been on loads of different medications. I’ve been on methotrexate for about 18 months, and it helped a bit. But I was still in a lot of pain, so my doctor started prescribing me etanercept. The etanercept has made such a difference and I’ve got a lot more energy now.

Coping with flare ups

Some people don’t understand that I might wake up in the morning and have a flare-up, which can be difficult when making plans. I might not be able to make it that day because I can’t get on the bus or the train. Or, maybe I’m not comfortable driving that day because I’m tired and haven’t slept all night. Every day is different though and it’s not something I can predict.

It can be exhausting being a mum with rheumatoid arthritis. So, I think it’s important to accept help and make things easy for yourself. 
We keep batch meals in the freezer so that on days that I’m tired or I’m having a flare-up, we have easy meals on hand rather than having to get a takeaway or cook from scratch. We also keep a bag of new toys or colouring books so that I can sit down and play with the kids if I’m having a flare-up and can’t run around after them.

My husband supports me, and my mum has been brilliant as well. She calls me every day and helps out if I’m having a bad day. 

I work as an accountant, and my workplace has been very supportive, especially because I have so many appointments. I’ve found working from home better too. It’s not a rush in the morning to get ready and, on a bad day, you can lie down on the sofa if you just need 10 minutes to rest.

I wish I had researched more about rheumatoid arthritis when I was first diagnosed. Through Arthritis UK and Instagram, I found a community. It’s helped having that support, and I’ve made a few friends as well. I felt guilty some days, especially when the kids want to do things or run around, and I can’t do it. It’s helpful to feel like you’re in the same boat as other people – that it’s not just me."